COMPLETELY HONEST FIRST DATE

Dating can be a pain in the ass. You never know what to expect, what you're gonna get, or if it's a completely miserable waste of your time. I've never had a bad date, but I imagine some of you out there who are lucky enough to get dates(very few of the Flint Skinny readers are date-able) have had a few bad experiences. What if you could just cut through all the crap though? Sure you eliminate any chance of finding true happiness, but you at least don't have to deal with all that other bullshit.

In the words of Nick Johnson, "I don't get handjobs."