Beyoncé slays your faves - YET AGAIN

"Run The World (Girls)" is now a gold-selling top 10 hit. In Australia. Not only that but "Best Thing I Never Had" is already top 30 on our iTunes with no airplay or promotion - a stark contrast to its position in America. I think we all know what this means. Beyoncé is the new Kat DeLuna. Only instead of ruling Belgium's airwaves, Honey B is snatching wigs from Penrith to Perth. Kelly Rowland could never!

Beyoncé update - album details & video preview

Beyoncé's non-existent "Run The World (Girls)" promo campaign finally kicked off today with an insightful interview with Billboard magazine, the first album review and a longer video teaser. It's a lot of information to process - so here are the most important tidbits:

1. Bey's soon-to-be-all-conquering 4th album will be called "4". The title isn't going to win any awards for originality but at least it isn't an embarrassment like "B'Day". It's also a cute nod to fans who nicknamed the project "Round IV", so I'm on board.

2. The more I hear about this project, the more I'm convinced we're about to embark upon the 16 time Grammy winner's "Impossible Princess" phase. Everything from the line-up of producers to the scheduled rock festival appearances and list of influences screams edgy and experimental.

3. My gut feeling was pretty much confirmed by B's riveting Billboard interview, in which she said:

"I love... mixing different cultures and eras — things that typically don’t go together — to create a new sound. I can never be safe; I always try and go against the grain."

Truth!

4. She then listed her influences for the album as DeBarge, Fela Kuti, Adele, Lionel Richie, Muse, Teena Marie (YES!), Jackson 5, New Edition, Florence + the Machine, Prince and Rage Against The Machine. This is so exciting! I'm picking up on a strong retro R&B vibe with a little rock thrown in for good measure.

5. I love that Beyoncé is taking risks and growing. She could have easily phoned up Max Martin and Dr Luke like every other ho in the game and picked up 10 radio ready hits but that's what separates a legend like Mrs Knowles-Carter from manufactured pop stars like Britney and Rihanna - the drive to try new things and grow. It might be a total disaster but I'd prefer she experiment than play it safe and just be another number in the pack. This is all or nothing. And my money is still on Bey.

6. The highest earning pop star on the planet is feeling older and wiser. In another interesting Billboard quote, she says:

"I'm approaching 30, and finally took a break in my life, which I’ve never had. I took more than a year off: I traveled around, spent time with my husband, woke up in my own bed, ate whatever I wanted, went to museums and Broadway plays, watched documentaries, and just had life experiences."

In a typically biased and unnecessarily hateful post, my frenemy The Prophet desperately clutched at straws by citing a couple of random features as proof that Bey never got off the grind but truth be told she's been keeping a low profile since "Telephone", singing the occasional verse for friends and releasing a video for "Why Don't You Love Me?" that probably took 30 minutes to make. Apart from that she's just been snapped going to restaurants, hanging out at music festivals and travelling around Europe. I'm glad she's had the chance to recharge her batteries and bring fresh ideas to the table. Her increasingly stale rivals should try it.

7. The only child of destiny that counts confirmed she will star in a re-make of "A Star Is Born" - a role previously played by gay icon Barbra Streisand and Judy Garland. Bey now walks in the company of legends while Brit Brit is desperately trying to pitch "Crossroads 2" to Doll Phace.

8. A listening party was held in New York overnight and Just Jared posted the first review. It sounds amazing - particularly the song with the Boys II Men sample - but again I'm left with the impression that there are no instant radio hits on there. Which excites and scares me in equal measure.

9. I'm really excited that Beysus is embracing a more organic, instrument based sound. That kind of accompaniment will really compliment her glorious voice and produce a timeless album.

10. The first real look at "Run The World (Girls)" arrived today and it's absolutely flawless. I generally ignore YouTube comments but I agree with the stan who said "Sorry Gaga, but THIS is what $10 million should look like!" Francis Lawrence has crafted something truly epic. It's too early to start raving like a lunatic but - from the teaser alone - this is already the video of the year. The post-apocalyptic scenario is audacious and compelling. There are fucking hyenas in it. Bey's lacefront slays my life. That's all you really need to know.

Get ready to cry and shake!

An Open Letter To Jody Watley

Dear Jody,

You used to be cool. "Looking For A New Love" is one of my all time favourite jams and "Larger Than Life" is flawless - beginning to end. I even continued buying your albums when the hits dried up about... 20 years ago because I'm loyal to my faves regardless of their has-been status. But I'm out. Your hateful Twitter tirade against Beyoncé showed your true colours. What kind of bitter mess throws shade at a charity single? Queen B is helping raise money for orphans and widows. To paraphrase another flop that hasn't had a hit in decades - what have you done for anyone lately? I can't believe you had the nerve to imply that Bey is being opportunistic. That's some hilarious shit coming from a woman who walked around the streets of LA with fake plastic surgery scars on her face to drum up publicity for an album called "The Makeover". All that humiliation and it still failed to chart! You're entitled to your opinion and can say whatever you like but don't turn into an hysterical drama queen when the Killer Beys attack. I know you don't have many followers but Twitter is a public forum. Ranting about insecure fans, sending crazy tweets demanding people unfollow you and then deleting all your comments is not a good look.

Goodbye and good riddance,

Mike

X

PS. Here's the charity single you were dissing. Check it out. You could learn a lot from this flawless vocal performance. But I guess it's too late to teach an old dog new tricks.

Run The World - Preview 2

Beyoncé's "Run The World (Girls)" promo campaign could finally be getting under way with a second preview of the video surfacing this morning. As usual, the undisputed Queen of pop/international fashion mogul/critically acclaimed actress/professional wig snatcher etc etc delivers the goods. The Francis Lawrence directed clip looks like a winner and could breathe some life into the most curiously understated promotional campaign in pop history. To recap - as of this moment there have been no TV interviews, no print interviews, no radio interviews, no tweets, no performances and no desperate celebrity remixes to promote the song. Hell, the audio isn't even on VEVO internationally yet!

So can one amazing clip kickstart this hottest of hot messes? Maybe. From the two previews, Beysus has really outdone herself. She looked fucking amazing on that black stallion in the first clip and the second offering is even more stunning. Basically, a bunch of scantily-clad hos roll around around the desert looking lost and glamorous. Think Mad Max crossed with America's Next Top Model. As the only big name diva that can dance, the choreography should be amazing and the visuals look stunning. My gut tells me it's too little, too late but I'm glad they are pushing "Girls" instead of jumping straight into single number two. Nothing says desperation quite like the old "it was just a buzz single" trick. I'm looking at you, Keri Hilson.

And while the hood anthem is unlikely to scale the same heights as Bey's previous singles, it will definitely climb the charts with a decent push. Airplay is building on urban radio and the Queen just needs one knock-out live performance for the world to remember her complete and utter superiority to your faves. Check out the second preview below!

You will o-Bey her!

To be honest I'm completely mystified by Beyoncé's "Run The World (Girls)" campaign. I love it but any song without a chorus was always going to be a strange choice of lead single and her promotional schedule has thus far consisted of strolling around Paris looking fabulous. Even the person pretending to be Britney on Twitter occasionally tweets her fans! Meanwhile, Bey's account is as virginal as Michelle Williams' vagina. What is going on? Putting the finishing touches to her Obama sponsored crusade against childhood obesity it seems.

I should be annoyed but B's "Move Your Body" video, which dropped today, is easily the best thing I've seen all year. Just when I was beginning to question the Queen's mojo, she comes out of nowhere and snatches every wig in sight with her beauty, charisma and killer dance moves. In case you missed my previous "Move Your Body" post, the song is a kid friendly re-work of "Get Me Bodied" with new choreography intended to burn calories! Beyoncé rocks a killer pair of denim shorts and knee high socks in the ridiculously cute video but it's her sweetness and flawless dancing that gets me.

She really is in a league of her own when she cuts loose and has fun. Bey has the music in her. You can see the joy on her face as she gets her Dougie on and does the running man. "Move Your Body" was obviously shot in a couple of takes for next to nothing but it has more charm and personality that Riri's entire filmography. Watch in awe as a legend does her thang.